Simon & Schuster’s spring 2008 catalog arrived the other day, with a cover blurb “Introducing Jon Scieszka’s Trucktown — the first of 52 titles!”

Just nine words, but they’re packed with hidden messages.

To retailers: “If your usual promo display is like an overnight visit, think of this as a 30-year mortgage.”

To libraries: “Like you’ve got the staff to pick and choose among these — just order ’em all.”

To other publishers: “You’ll certainly never attempt to follow our lead and come up with a publishing program this extensive with such a marquee name.”

To illustrators: “You must be curious about what sort of superartist we have assembled to handle such a project.”

To published writers: “Say, why hasn’t your agent sold a book of yours each week for a solid year?”

To unpublished writers: “We’re good on truck manuscripts. Thanks.”